Easter Croquet

I played croquet yesterday and came in last place. I hate croquet. But more importantly, I hate playing croquet with old men (a friend's dad participated) who look all sweet, kind and innocent (like this "nice old man" to the left) but who turn out to take their senior citizenship and pull one over on you.





I attribute my loss to my second turn when I had the opportunity to launch this old man's ball into outer space but took pity on him because he, well, he looked like he could use a break. WRONG. The next time around he didn't even think twice about roqueting my ball down the hill and way out of play. It was a hit from which I never recovered. Lesson taken from this: don't trust "nice old men" and I can't wait to be old and stick it to people because your old age engenders sympathy.

From Mother, with Guilt

So last Sunday at about 3pm the lower right quadrant of my stomach area started hurting. Hurting enough that I laid in the fetal position for the remainder of the day and a continued so for a good portion of Monday. Fun. By the time Tuesday rolled around, I was feeling better but still somewhat discomforted by the pain. At that point, I made the mistake of telling my mom I was sick with what my roommate, a lady friend of mine and a few others with limited to no medical experience diagnosed as appendicitis. That was a mistake.

I tried with no success to tell her that I did not believe that I had appendicitis. I figured that if I had had appendicitis my symptoms would have probably been much worse than what they were and at that point I was going to wait it out. MISTAKE. Shortly after explaining that I wasn't going to go to the doctor, she hung up on me. Thanks, mom. Soon after that, I get a call from my sister (telling me to go to the Dr), and two of my brother in laws inquiring as to my health.

On Wednesday I still haven't made a Dr. appointment and my mom calls to tell me, "you can go and have your appendix out and spend one day in the hospital. Or you can wait for it to burst and spend 30 days in the hospital." Scare tactics...

Then on Thursday, I get this email, "On another note: I am preparing a bed for you because I see in my crystal ball that you will be returning VERY SOON.....for home nursing by mother to recover from a burst appendix. It will take 6 months to one year and after you recover (if) you will be assigned to a family ward. I JUST CAN'T come to San Diego and be away from my cat and my personal computer. So just bear that in mind while you're postponing your Dr. visit. Love and kisses from your concerned mother." I am speechless.

I bet you're all dying to know how this turned out. I'll tell you. It turned out exactly how I thought it would turn out. I went to the lousy Dr. on Friday only to be told that I don't have appendicitis but they don't know exactly what is causing the pain in the lower right quadrant. I had to pay $250 (high deductible insurance) for that one. Awesome. Thanks, mom. I love you too.

The Mailbox

Walked to the mailbox today and for some reason I gave the junk mail two seconds of my time, at which point I noticed the title on the post that said, "MONEY MAILER 'Like Getting Money in Your Mailbox.'"

That's funny. The last time I checked I didn't take money out of my mailbox and IMMEDIATELY throw it into the garbage can like I would have normally done with this "money mailer" had I not been so upset by its title that I had to take a photo of it first and make a posting.